But then again, I'm now a single mum to 2 kids, with no job, a fanny like a badly packed kebab and more tyres than fucking Kwik Fit! I may as well have, shit on my top – 'cos he is 6ft 1” of toned, sex on legs and I look like Mr Blobby on Crack!
''MUUUUUUUM'' - oh dear god, it must be morning and inevitably, one of the kids has clearly lost something! The funny thing is, I have the worst memory known to man so, i don't really know why they bother asking me at all.... but they do!